There’s been a ton of fun with Palin’s words. From mad libs to sentence diagrams only an English teacher is mad enough to map out. If you missed the clips from the Couric interview, it looked something like this:

*Biden’s Wordle is available here.

I think this theme song might be perfect for the new James Bond.

The core issue here, even more so with McCain’s advanced age and cancer history, is whether we want Gov. Palin to run our country. I’ve always found it odd, by the way, that such a vital position in our government is *not* left up to the voters; that it’s essentially determined by a team of lawyers and political strategists. But that’s what we’re stuck with for the moment, so let’s work with it. McCain’s team (and it’s known now that McCain wanted Lieberman instead) chose Palin for many reasons, some smart and some not so smart.

Smart:

• A relatively inexperienced newcomer – She can play on the messages of hope and change but Obama can’t attack, lest he highlight his own freshman status.
• Socially conservative – Locks up the contingent of voters who think religion should have a place in every form of government. Regular readers know how I love these folks but the fact remains that there are a lot of the little buggers.
• Intelligent and motivated – Excepting her belief in creationism, Gov. Palin seems to have her wits about her. She’s obviously a capable, smart leader who’s managed to run for office while raising children left and right. She can shoot bears, cut property taxes, and fill her former sleepy town with big-box stores, all while – and I’m only assuming here – frying bear-bacon up in a pan. Or whatever native meats are included with that NRA membership.

The Not-So-Smart:

• She’s a she – Is the ploy to draw in PUMAs so blatant and heavy-handed that it will backfire? I sincerely hope so. I can’t imagine that Hillary supporters would turn a blind eye to Palin’s hardcore stances on abortion, gun control and sex education, to name a few. Then again, hell hath no fury…
• Skeletons ahoy – Really, couldn’t they have put just a little more time into vetting? Palin’s got more intrigue and deception in her life story than I’m comfortable with in a leader. Bizarre decisions about childbirth, a drunk driving arrest for the ‘First Dude’ (his words, not mine), a pregnant daughter about to engage in a shotgun wedding with a real winner, and of course a very-much-official investigation into her firing practices of state employees. And this is just the stuff we know about.
• The God thing – By all indications, she’s more than just a Christian; she’s Ralph Reed on estrogen. James Dobson in a dress. This woman is Christian.  Why is this a bad thing, you ask? The answer to that question is so important, I’m abandoning the bullets.

Sarah Palin is so far right on social issues, there is no possible way she could run for president. Her uber-conservative views would immediately discount her, as they would alienate more moderate Republicans – and yes, they do exist. We all know she’s against abortion in all instances. But did you know that she opposes sex education in schools (so does McCain for that matter), including any information on contraceptives for teens? Or that, as mayor of Wasilla, she tried to fire a librarian who wouldn’t cooperate in book banning? Or that she doesn’t believe global warming is a result of human behavior? And of course, we can’t forget that she wants to teach creationism alongside evolution in public schools. I couldn’t find a mention of her stance on gay rights but I’ll give you three guesses and the first two don’t count.

As I mentioned in an online conversation last week, if we’re going to re-establish America as a theocracy, let’s throw out the Constitution and get on with it. Give me a little notice so I can flee the country first. But don’t wrap an American flag around a bible and sell it to me as democracy.

There are a lot of things that bug me about Sarah Palin. But what truly frightens me is what would happen to our country if she fell into the presidency.

From a Seamus Heaney poem, “The Cure at Troy”:

History says, Don’t hope
On this side of the grave.
But then, once in a lifetime
The longed-for tidal wave
Of justice can rise up
And hope and history rhyme

Sorenson added one final thought, ““I’ve seen it two times in my lifetime.”

With all the recent talk about votes who want change, both in policies and in their pockets, I’d like to get that credit card back in my wallet! I’d also like to cut up the card that’s keeping Hillary’s campaign going!

Did you know Cher is the only female performer to have top ten hits in every decade since the 60′s? I didn’t but it doesn’t surprise me. From my perspective, it does seem like she has always been there.

It felt something like flipping through my mother’s forgotten album collection and I was too curious to stop looking. I haven’t been an avid fan of either of these ladies so I won’t be able to dance with you over their accomplishments. What I began to see, however, is the role these women played as touchstones. That too seems to be something stretching across generations.

When Cher claimed the stage with electric blue hair, she was the picture of celebrating who you and where you are. Who can’t fall in love with that? She sat down to talk to Oprah and I was struck by her soft and quiet responses. I think this has puzzled me before, this quietness that’s as solid as stone and says I’ll hold my ground against any of them. Oprah’s appreciation of Cher’s daring is present throughout the conversation. I think my mother, who completed her entire education at St. Wendelin’s Catholic School and Ohio Dominican College, secretly admired that brazen sexiness too. My mother would never admit it, but Oprah is now reveling in it. Her eyes are on fire throughout the interview as though she now has electric blue hair.

I remember Cher’s attempt to turn back time in the 90′s. I didn’t care much for the music but knew I wanted to be able to rock like that when I was 50, if that’s what I decided to do. As a young woman just starting college I wasn’t sure I’d have my own internal combustion engine. That’s what I saw in Cher, unbridled horsepower.

Next on the show was Tina Turner. Apparently these two women first performed together nearly 30 years ago and would sing “Proud Mary” together one more time for Oprah. Tina, now 68, sat next to Cher for a chat amongst girlfriends. Sonny and Ike were mentioned as only one event of their long careers. Oprah asked about the money either of them owed to their exes after the break-ups and Tina turned to Cher to ask, “How could you have owed Sonny anything?” These were two women who knew they had it and now wondered how they ever doubted themselves.

In this celebration of two larger-than-life divas, this was a perfect “every woman” moment. Cher spoke about her stage fright and how daunting it was to consider dancing on stage with Tina Turner, “it’s like dancing with a hurricane.” There is something more natural about Tina’s raw power.

I’ve never been one for celebrity gawking so I don’t know the Ike and Tina story. Again, as a young woman, I knew there was a story of powerless submission and ferocious will power. I saw that in the frantic dancing on stage whenever I saw a clip of Tina performing. I wondered if I’d have the power to overcome whatever happened next and still be ready to dance triumphantly.

As that part of me that’s most aware of my place in this world as a woman contemplated these stories and how many of us have carried them with us, my internal processor nearly seized up over another detail. It was Cher’s mouth and Tina’s eyes. They looked alien. I tried to guess the procedures that mangled their faces and what they said to themselves when they looked into the mirror and decided a procedure was necessary.

The criticism wanted to work its way to a conclusion and I thought about dismissing all previous thoughts about resilience and power. Surely these unnatural smiles revealed them to be frauds. Today I”m not so young and I have the strength to say I”m never going to contemplate a nip or a tuck. Then I recognize the fierce independence in my own statement.

I feel the hum of my own combustion engine and know gale force winds couldn’t change my mind. Cher and Tina are two remarkable women who have played supporting roles to each of us, whether we know it or not, as we realize who we are and what we are not.

This sorely underestimates the intelligence of the voting public as well. Who believes oil companies will pay the gas tax reinvented as a windfall profit tax without raising the price at the pump? There’s nothing prohibiting the oil companies from adjusting their price after the government adjusts their costs. And, there are just a few of us who remember the gas lines the last time Congress tried to fix the price of gas.

On ABC’s This Week today, Hillary said she doesn’t need an economist’s approval to know this is an idea that works for working Americans. This is more governing from the gut directed towards earning the allusive political capital she thought she had in the bag. I’d like to hear the new ideas experts believe could work for all of us, something that works for the next three months and the next three years.

Hillary’s proposal isn’t just about the short term as she insisted. It’s simply short sighted. This proposed holiday will put a few extra pennies in the average American’s pockets for a few days but that change will continue to do less and less for us without real solutions.

She can keep my thirty cents because I want more. I want 50 mpg to be the norm the next time I shop for a car and I want a concern about global warming to drive government decision making like it drives my decisions at home. Is it hard? yes. Is it more expensive? Yes. But I believe I’m worth it and protecting our future quality of life is more important than empty rhetoric about punishing the oil companies.

This isn’t their problem, it’s ours. They’re the suppliers and we’re the addicts and those roles will persist until we do something to break that addiction. We don’t need a price break. We need an intervention.

It isn’t a new phenomena but the power of the right song to transcend the continuum of time and space amazes me every time. One of Einstein’s theories of time provides for every instance of ourselves to continue to exist in each moment we’ve lived. A song with the perfect wavelength provides a wormhole that transports you directly back to one of those moments. As if admitting a moment of joy over “Jack and Diane” wasn’t enough, I’ve been contemplating what other songs work as mile markers like this.

Here’s a mildly unashamed walk through my life via the music that somehow defined it. If you snicker even once, you owe me your own confession in the comments…

“I Want a New Drug” by Huey Lewis and the News takes me back to a pivotal moment in my family life. We were moving from Ohio to Texas in the early 80′s. Part of the moving plan included my dad driving his 1979 Ford Mustang to Texas and then taking a Greyhound bus back to Ohio to drive the U-Haul. I was a lucky fifth-grader who was able to tag along for the adventure. I imagined myself to be a great writer and wrote a story about Pac-Man while we were on the road. When I hear the heartbeat of this Huey Lewis and the News song, I can imagine the wheels spinning down the road, the red vinyl, and my incredible journey….with my dad and Pac Man!

Ok, this one hurts a little. You might snicker but then you owe me your owe me!

I can’t hide my middle school self’s joy when “Footloose” gets time on the radio. A very good friend of mine died our freshman year of high school and I’m pretty convinced she would point to this 8th grade slumber party at her as one of the best times of her life. Our small group of friends danced and danced and danced in the living room that night. We played Light as a Feather with St. Elmo’s Fire playing in the background. When I hear this song I can still see all the stuff in her mother’s china cabinet bouncing back and forth with us as we…uh…cut footloose.

Yeah, I’m groaning over that one too but sometimes you just have to embrace it.

And the Beastie Boys’ “Paul Revere” is an instant celebration. I still know all the words to it too. A friend and I spent most of our time in Algebra trading lines from Beastie Boys songs. We were trying to figure our lives out and it was easier to imagine this song would reveal a secret than it was to think Algebra would have anything to do with it.

I still don’t understand how that cynical student became a teacher but I did. Rancid’s “Time Bomb” takes me straight back to those first three years of teaching when I was on the verge of becoming a statistic. 50% of our new teachers leave the profession within the first three years. I understood why and Rancid helped me funnel the rage through their frantic and driving music while I made sense of my adult life.

Before this becomes “This is Your Life the Mixtape,” let me ask…what song takes you there?

PA was Clinton’s to run with from here to the convention but she can’t do it despite miserable media for Obama. She doesn’t even have the kitchen sink left for the next two weeks and is millions of dollars in debt. And, what about those pesky math problems?

Chuck Todd reported Clinton would need to win more than 80% of the vote in the remaining primary states to walk into the convention with the competitive tone she has imagined. In everyone else’s book that equation works out to a zero chance of winning the nomnination.

A tight Obama win in IN and maintaining a double digit win in NC should take care of it, even for those who believe math is open to debate.

His proposal was war games. With the next debate on ice, perhaps we can consider this alternative.

Lock the presidential candidate and a team of advisers in a make-believe bunker. Saudi Arabia has military vehicles in motion and appears to be preparing to fire a nuclear weapon at Israel. What do you do? Have the writing team for West Wing provide the responses to the candidates’ proposed actions. Who launches our military firepower the fastest and what steps do they take first?

That might tell you something that matters about the would-be President.

Whatever you thought of the moderators last week, does anyone really want to listen to another 20 minute discussion about universal healthcare with and without mandates? Plenty of people are watching this primary who have never watched before and we’re all tired of the nuanced arguments that make a negative ad positive. This is politics as a spectator sport and the spectators are bored.

Let’s give them something to see…What should replace any remaining debates?

A reality TV show where candidates are charged with growing a financial investment or charitable contribution? Don’t forget the popular vote by phone or text at the end of each episode!

A smackdown in the wrestling ring with silly slogans and threats tossed at opponents?

A monster car event with a fire breathing robosaurus whatever his opponent would be?

A NASCAR race? Ask the candidate to explain the winning strategy in terms of balancing resources and maintaining position to win.